June 3rd part 1

Oh boy, a lot has happened this month!  God has taken me on a journey, and if you told me in February that God and I were about to do the things I have done this month, I would have laughed in your face and said you are talking about the wrong girl.

Let me give you a little more backstory before I get into what happened on June 3rd...

About 4 months ago, I felt like God was starting to lay a few things on my heart.  I just felt this tug in the back of my mind…
Help them.  What can you do to help?  How are you going to honor Jaxon and his 38 1/2 weeks of life?  God has a purpose for Jaxon, for your pain.  Follow my lead.  You can do this.  What if my church did a hope box gathering?  

This was late February, and shortly after having these thoughts, I had sent an email to our women's pastor, Jodie, suggesting the idea of putting Hope Boxes on the list of things to do for a "service project."  Each year, each table in our women's bible study (there are typically about 30 tables, 8-10 women at each table) complete a service project.  Women can volunteer at a homeless shelter, do a 5k and raise money for that race's cause, or fill any other need the community has.  If the table is undecided on what to do, there is a list of options given to help with ideas.  I suggested that we give them the option of putting together a Hope Box or two for a newly bereaved mom.

Turns out it was a little too late to add this project to the list this year, but next year it would totally be an option.  Score!!  But Jodie also suggested something I wasn't expecting.  She said, why don't you share your story with the ladies and how this study has been working in your life?  (Our study was about the women in Luke and one of the first lessons was "giving up control in exchange for peace.")  I had so much to say, but I was terrified!!  You can read some about this here. When that day came around (March 25th) I was sooo nervous, but I did it.  And I rambled like a silly person, but I overcame a BIG fear of mine (for that day) and I spoke Jaxon's story and how God was using my suffering to speak to me and get me through the daily struggles of being without my boy.  In front of 300 women.  With a microphone.

I was on this high after doing the unthinkable, and I emailed Jodie again, asking her thoughts on doing a hope box gathering during the summer bible study.  And she said yes.

She said yes!  Yay!!

And she would like for me to come tell a little about it on the first night of the summer study.  In front of 300 women.  With a microphone.  On stage.

On June 3rd.