Wednesday, July 30, 2014


I had the most amazing dream.

A few day ago, I woke up from sleep, pretty much in tears of joy.  I have done a lot of thinking about Jaxon in heaven with my grandmother.  I wonder what their relationship looks like, if she was there to greet him when he came home.  She loves children.  I remember gathering around her with my cousins and listening to her tell stories of her as a little girl, walking home from school, being chased by a bobcat all the way home.  :)  She told that story with such animation- opening her eyes big and wide like the bobcat's eyes, switching to the fear on her face as she realized she was being stalked by that bobcat.  Needless to say, she got home safely because she grew up to have 10 kids and many grandchildren, I don't even know that number...

In my dream, I was back at her house.  She lived out in the country on top of a big rocky hill that overlooked the Red River.  Beautiful spot.  As you climb up her long, rocky driveway to the top of the hill, you see her house on the left and to the right was her garden.  She grew all types of veggies, but what I remember the most was her garlic and her purple hull peas. 

In my dream, I pull up her driveway, alone, I get out of my car and I see my grandmother in her garden.  She is sitting in her garden on a chair with a bowl of purple hull peas, splitting them and separating the peas from their pods.  I look at her, she looks at me, she drops her bowl of peas and runs over to me.  Picture that, an old lady, running to greet her granddaughter.  I must say, that she never ran to me like this while she was alive, she did love me no doubt and told me this often, but she was not fast by any means, and she didn't show her affection with hugging in this way.

I noticed something very new in my dream.  Her farm was long and it went down the other side of the hill she lived on.  On the other side of this hill was a beautiful river, flowing pretty fast, yet peaceful. 

Then when my grandmother got to me, she hugged me, and she whispered in my ear, sing Amazing Grace with me.  We held our embrace, and she began singing, I began to cry.  Then by the end of the song, I was singing along with her... the emotion running through my veins is pretty much indescribable.  The best way I can put it- pure joy to the point of tears. 

I wish I would have seen my Jaxon, but I know he is there too.  What I saw was my grandmother in heaven, happier than I have ever seen her before, praising our God who makes beautiful, amazing things.  And He gives us beyond what our imaginations can fathom- He gives us things on the inside.  Joy, appreciation.  On unimaginably new and higher levels.   

I know this was just a dream, and the real heaven is nothing I can really imagine or understand with my human pea brain, lol.  But it was neat to be able to dream about it and have this wave of excitement come over me as I think and wonder.

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